Ask Spain and Romano
by bomb4st1cb1rd13
Summary: Spain and Romano answer questions from the fans...well, Spain answers...Romano was threatened to participate which he probably won't do...but I'll make him. Ask anything at all Dearies!
1. Chapter 1

I saw like 2 stories like this and I doubt that somebody is gonna do one for Spain and Romano. So, I'll do one. :3 This idea originally came from **AquaxFlame96** and I want to answer some questions with Lovino and Antonio. Hope yall like it!

~GO!~

**Birdie**: Ok, so you guys ready to get some questions and answer them?

**Lovi**: Peach-Bitch(AN: I like peaches, they're my favorite next to green apples)...why do we have to do this!

**Toni**: Now Lovi, don't be mean to Senorita Birdie.

**Lovi**: Shut it Tomato bastard! I'll talk to her how ever I want!

**Birdie**: Oh Lovi, you and your rude ways...its so cute! *glomps Lovi*

**Lovi**: CHIGIII! Get the hell off of me, crazy wench!

**Toni**: Aww, how nice. We're all getting along with each other. :D

**Lovi**: Get off of me! *runs behind Toni*

**Birdie**: Aww, he's hiding!

**Lovi**: SHUT UP!

**Birdie**: Enzyme way, please send us some questions for them to answer. kk?

**Lovi**: Why do we have to do this! I'm not doing it! And you can't make me!

**Birdie**: *looks bored then looks at sharp nails* I wonder what would happen of my nails came in contact with a certain piece of hair on a certain Italian's head...and I'm not talking about Feli or Wy either...*dead serious glare*

**Lovi**: *shudder* Umm, well...I guess it wouldn't hurt to answer one or two-

**Birdie**: many

**Lovi**:...many questions from the fans...but I won't like it!

**Toni**: You don't have to like it Lovi, just do it for me? Please? *baby turtle eyes*

**Lovi**:...shut up Tomato-Bastard! I'm not doing this fucking thing for you! I'm doing it because that damn bitch over there*points to Birdie* is an evil "Birdie" from Germany sent to torture me! It's all that Potato-Bastard's fault! Everything is!

**Birdie**: Actually Lovi-hunny, I'm from America...his genitals to be exact(AN: GO LOOK AT A MAP AND TELL ME THAT ALABAMA ISN'T ONE OF HIS BALLS!) *shudder*. And my ancestors hail from Africa...or did my dark skin not give it away?

**Lovi**: ...but you have bloodlines that trace back to the Potato-Bastard!

**Birdie**: We don't even know where my European blood leads back to! It could be Germany, it could be from you and Feli! It could even be from Russia!

**Lovi**: Don't say that Vodka-Bastard's name! He'll pop up-

**Ivan**: You called Ptichka(Birdie)?

**Birdie**: No, Vanya-hunny. Go back and drink some vodka or rape Alfred, I'll be back in a moment! *kisses Ivan's nose*

**Alfred**: *off screen* Don't tell that Commie Bastard to rape me!

**Ivan**: Da, is your vodka still in the secret compartment in your dresser?

**Birdie**: Yes...and don't tell to many people about that, I'm not old enough to drink remember?

**Ivan**: *nods and walked away*

**Toni**: *is a current space cadet right now*

**Birdie**: So, just drop us your questions and we'll get back to you on them! Bye!

**Lovi**: Potato-Bitch, you are forgetting something.

**Birdie**: Oh yea! This is the format in which your questions should be!

**_[Dear Lovi/Toni,_**

**_*insert question(s) here*_**

**_*insert username or nickname here*]_**

**Birdie**: Not too hard right? Kesesesesesesesese

**Lovi**: AHHH, You laugh like the Bird-Bastard!

**Birdie**: Yea, so? Anywho, be sure to ask us some questions!


	2. Chapter 2

**Birdie**: Ok, we have 3 questions here that we has to answer! Yay!

**Lovi**: Shut the hell up! Its not that fucking exciting!

**Toni**: But Lovi, don't you want to hear what the fans have to say?

**Lovi**: No, I don't give a damn about the fans or what they have to say!

**Birdie**: Lovi...do I have to grab my nail file?

**Lovi**:...no.

**Birdie**: *cheery voice* Good! So here's our first questions. Its from Pkmn Trainer Bronze.

**Lovi**: What kind of a name is that?

**Birdie**: Lovi-hunny, its a username, they can make it what ever they want.

**Lovi**: Its still dumb.

**Toni**: Lovi, be nice. *hands Lovi a tomato*

**Lovi**: *snatches tomato and begins to eat it*

**Birdie**: *rolls eyes* Ok, here's the first question:

_**Dear Toni,**_

_**have you always loved Romano? Ever since he was a baby? : 3 and if so, what kept you from glomping him? (other than him torturing you?)**_

_**~Pkmn Trainer Bronze**_

**Lovi**: What kind of a fucking question is that!

**Birdie**: Hush Lovi, its not your turn. Go ahead Toni. :)

**Toni**: Ok, well I guess I've always loved him, I mean who COULDN'T love such a cute little Italian!

**Lovi**: Hey!

**Toni**: But I didn't develop romantic feeling for him until he looked like a teenager. I glomped him once...then he head butted me in the stomach.

**Lovi**: *snicker*

**Toni**: But I did pinch his face cheeks because they felt so soft and adorable! *pinches Lovi's jaw*

**Lovi**: Dammit Tomato-Bastard! Let the fuck go! *blushes*

**Birdie**: Ahhhh, tsundere love. You can never get enough. So next question from the same person:

_**Dear Lovi,**_

_**do you really hate Antonio? Or is that hate to cover something else? *wink* = 3=**_

_**~Pkmn Trainer Bronze**_

**Lovi**: Of course I hate him! Who could love that happy-go-lucky, spazzy, space cadet like, handsome, and kind, and loving Tomato-Bastard!

**Toni**: *teary eyes* Awww Lovi! You do care! *glomps Lovi and gives him little kisses all over his face*

**Lovi**: Dammit Tomato-Bastard! Get off of me!

**Birdie**: Lovi...you know that you want Toni to love you. =_=U

**Lovi**: Nu-uh!

**Birdie**: Anyway, lets move on with the next question:

_**Dear Lovi,**_

_**Don't be so angry! All the people who're replying love you with their fangirly love! If we gave you 1,000 delicious, perfect, plump tomatoes, would you smile for us (and Antonio? Heheh)**_

_**-Kiba**_

_**Lovi: *blushes* Shut up! You don't know anything!**_

**Birdie**: Lovi! Be nice and answer the nice fan's question!

**Lovi**: Ugh, I'm not always angry! Its just that everyone else around me is stupid! And it depends, if sexy ladies are giving me the tomatos, then yes I'll smile...for the ladies. Not for that Tomato-Bastard!

**Toni**: Awww Lovi, I thought that you loved me.

**Lovi**: Not enough to smile for you. *crosses arms*

**Birdie**: Anyway! Lets move on to our last question of the day shall we!

**Lovi**: No, we shall not!

**Birdie**: Why the hell not Lovi!

**Lovi**: Because how the hell do we know if this one isn't gonna ask an odd question!

**Birdie**: We don't...

**Lovi**: Exactly!

**Birdie**: You know what if you don't wanna answer it then we'll just let Toni answer it, right Toni? *looks at Toni*

**Toni**: *space cadet mode induced*

**Lovi**: HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, have fun with that Potato-Bitch.

**Birdie**: Whatever Lovi, here's the question:

_**Dear Lovi-chii & Antonio,**_

_**If you ever got into a HUGE fight what would it be over? Oh, and what were happen if Lovi's having a baby!**_

_**(I plan to write a story with you two having a baby and a huge argument)**_

_**SINCERELY,**_

_**Sava**_

**Lovi**: O.O...

**Toni**: Oh Lovi! We should a bebe! It would be so cute!

**Lovi**: We are not having a bambino! It wouldn't like me and it would despise you!

**Toni**: Oh well...sadness. See, we're getting into a fight right now about have a little bebe. That is kinda a big argument, and it will probably continue after this chapter is over. :D

**Birdie**: He ain't lying...it probably will.

**Lovi**: We would have a big fight about how he always wants to be so fucking cheery all the time! And how he's always trying to have sex with me.

**Birdie**: Be quiet...you know you liiiiiike it.

**Lovi**: *blushes heavily* No, I do not! He sucks at it.

**Toni**: No Lovi, that's your job.

**Birdie**: *major nosebleed!* Wow...hehehehehehehe *mumbles* Note to self, employ Hungary to spy and get pictures of sexy time with Toni and Lovi.

**Toni**: If Lovi were to have a bebe, it would be the most magical thing ever. I would be a proud papa and shout out to the heavens "My Lovino Vargas is giving birth to out beautiful bebe!"

**Feli**: Ve~~ Fratello's having a bambino!

**Birdie**: FELI! *huggle/glomp* Ohhh, my adorable Veneziano! What are you doing here?

**Feli**: I heard Spain-niichan say that Fratello was having a bambino ve~~

**Lovi**: Feli! I'm not having a baby!

**Feli**: Then can I have one? Ve~

**Birdie**&**Lovi**: "Yes""No!"

**Feli**: Ok, I'll go tell Doitsu! Ve~ Ciao Perdere Birdie!(Miss Birdie). *runs to Ludwigs's house*

**Birdie**: Bye Feli-Baby! I'll be over soon! Tell Luddy to have some wurst ready! *waves rapidly to Feli*

**Lovi**: Why did you tell him that!

**Birdie**: Because it made him happy!

**Lovi**: But-mphmphmhfnhgnfbhg bk. *gets gagged by a bandana*

**Birdie**: Toni, take him and start on that baby!

**Toni**: Si Senorita Birdie! *picks Lovi up and runs away*.

**Birdie**: Have Fun! And fanpeople, ask more questions! It makes me happy! *mumbles* Now to go call Hungary and tell her to get them pictures tonight. Mwahahahahahahahaha.


	3. Chapter 3

Yea, I've been behind on some things…..school, my Sr. Year, my dad being a douche…..yea. So, here's the next three questions for Lovi and Toni! I own nothing!

**Birdie**: Ok, lets get down to business!

**Lovi**: Shut up! I have a killer headache!

**Birdie**: May I ask why Lovi-dear?

**Toni:** Its because he hasn't seen the light in a while Senorita Birdie.

**Birdie**: Did this have ANYTHING to do with you guys working on that magical baby?

**Toni**: Yes…yes it did…..hehehehehehehehe

**Birdie**: ….bow chika wow wow?

**Lovie**: Can we just get this thing over with already! My head hurts and-

**Birdie**: Which head? Bahahahahahahahaha, I couldn't resist it!

**Lovi**: …..

**Birdie**: Ok, ok, I'll try to resist my urges to be a fangirl…..maybe.

**Toni**: So, Senorita Birdie, how was your family vacation?

**Birdie**: Besides the fact that my father is a giant douche and my mom yelled at me for my crying tic, its ok. I saw a lot of Italian resturants down there and I wanted to stop at one…but my parents said no.

**Toni**: Awww *huggles Birdie*

**Birdie**: Thank you Toni…..anywho, lets start answering these questions! Seems like we've gotten a lot of mail…great….more paper cuts. Here's another from _**Pkmn Trainer Bronze**_.

_**Dear Toni,**_

LOVI MY USERNAME IS NOT STUPID! I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS!

Hey Toni~when are you planning to marry Lovino? Hmm? ;) and also what ever happened to the Philippines? Didn't you take her from China and invaded and ruled her and stuff?

**Birdie**: Yea! When ARE you and Lovi gonna get hitched!

**Toni**: The plans are in the making, and Lovie can't decide who he wants to design his dres-

**Lovi**: SHUT UP TOMATO BASTARD!

**Birdie**: Its between _**Versace**_ and _**Gucci**_ isn't it?

**Toni**: Pretty much. :3

**Birdie**: *looks at Lovi* I would go with Gucci, their stuff is niiiiiiiice.

**Lovi**: I'm so surprised that you didn't say that Gucci is "**fih"**.

**Birdie:** Lovi, I may be black but I don't follow their stupid slang words unless I really like something.

**Lovi**: Yea, well- HEY! I'll call your name anything I want STUPIDO!

**Birdie**: *facepalm*

**Toni**: Calm down Lovi, its not good for the baby….

**Lovi**: There is NO baby dumbass!

**Birdie**: There WILL be one if I want there to be one!

**Toni**: SI~ And also…Philippines was a very dark time for me….I don't want to talk about it.

**Birdie**: Anywho, next question.

_**Dear Lovi and Toni,**_

Who loves tomatoes more between the two of you?

What does Spain love more: tomatoes, Lovi, or turtles?

- Noke Neko Lover

**Lovi**: I most definitely love tomatoes more.

**Toni**: Um, Lovi-hunny, I think that I love tomatoes more.

**Lovi**: The hell you do, I love them more.

**Toni:** Somehow I doubt this Lovi.

**Lovi**: I sang a f*cking song about them! I love them more!

**Toni**: I introduced them to you! So ha!

**Birdie: **The tomatoes are what brought you together, don't let them tear you apart!

**Toni: **Senorita Birdie is right…..we musn't fight….come here Lovino. *hold out arms for make-up hug*

**Lovi**: um…maybe later….when potato-bitch is not around.

**Birdie**: *pulls out a pistol* Is this gun loaded from when me and Vanya played "Russian Roulette: Double or Nothing"?

**Lovi**: *cowers away from Birdie and flees into Antonio's arms*.

Birdie: That's better. Here's our last question. :3

_**Dear Sir Antonio and Sir Lovi~**_

If you had a dog and a cat, what would their names be? Is there a certain kind of dog/cat you would like? Heehee, thanks for answering! -gives both a tomato-

~Kiba

**Toni**: Well, we already have two cats. Lovinici and Antomato. X3

**Lovi**: He choose his cat's name…..poor cat bastard…and Lovinici is a tabby like Feliciano's cat Gino. They're twins, like us.

**Toni**: Antomato is a mixed breed, but he has a pretty little collar with a rosary and cross on it! *squee*

**Birdie**: Well, that's all the time we have for today. I'm gonna go take a nap before pottery class (I'm in school right now…..heeheeheeheehee). See ya's lates!

**Lovi**: Dammit Tomato Bastard, what have I told you about letting her hang around with Feliks!

**Birdie: **Oh, and you guys give me some prompts and stuff. I'm starting a drabble series on Spamano and RussiAmerica!

**Lovi**: You are a sad, sick, and strange little woman.


	4. Chapter 4

**Birdie**: Sorry I haven't been answering questions! School is horrible, Sr. Year sucks ass majorly, and I have been in a Romano mood ever since after Christmas and school started back. Let me tell you, Urinary Tract infections are a BITCH!

**Lovi**: So, you've been sick, pissed off, and have had the urge to use a tommy gun on all the useless dumbasses you know?

**Birdie**: Pretty much basically!

**Lovi**: SO WHY DIDN'T YOU?

**Birdie**: Lovi-baby, that's illegal in the state of Alabama.

**Lovi: **SO!

**Toni**: Lovi, let Senorita Birdie ask the question please?

**Birdie**: Thank you Tonio. So, here's our first question!

_**Dear Lovi-chii & Antonio,**_

_**Hola! It's me again! Guys regarding you're baby (I really am writing out the story...but on paper first), what type of name would you give her? I have Luciana Rosangela-Azmaria Vargas but I'm not sure of the Azmaria part of the middle name. ALSO, do you guys have any old enimies wantig revenge from the mafia?**_

_**Sincerely, Sava & YOUR FUTURE BABY!**_

_**p.s. Here are some tomatos! Oh, and the some churros...with chocolate!**_

**Birdie**: I like the name better without Azmaria part, but it is still a pretty name!

**Lovi**: What is all this shit about a fucking baby!

**Toni**: Lovi, I want a baby! Please!

**Lovi:** Fuck no!

**Toni**: The name is ok. *takes churros and hands Lovi the tomatoes*

**Lovi**: *snatches tomatoes and starts to eat* It's a pretty name.

**Birdie**: The hell…? Give him tomatoes and he's an angel? The world makes no sense any more!

**Lovi**: Shut the fuck up! Next question!

_**Dear sparkly Toni,**_

_**How was your baby-making session with Lovi yesterday? I bet it was indeed very fruitful ;)**_

_**I have a question for pretty Lovi as well: what traits from Spain would you like your future child to inherit? And from you?**_

_**~Pixelmicrocat**_

**Toni**: It was a beautiful session, thank you for asking! Lovi's face was aglow when he-

**Lovi**: SHUT UP! *headbutts Toni*

**Birdie**: Lovi! That wasn't nice!

**Lovi:** Who cares? Anyway, If we did have a kid, WHICH WE WON'T, I would like for it to have Antonio's curly hair, his smile, and his eyes…the kid shouldn't have anything from me…I'm just a nobody.

**Toni**: Oh Lovi! *snuggles Lovi*

**Birdie**: Awww! *goes in for group hug*

**Lovi**: *gives Stay-the-fuck-away look*

**Birdie**: Alright, alright, jeez…so here's our last question!

_**Dear Antonio!**_

_**It's the awesome me! kesesesese, anyway Toni whats yours and that fiesty Italians favorite position... ;)**_

_**~Sincerly**_

_**Hetalian Prussia**_

_**p.s: Mein mattie has been wondering when we can have a double date...kesesese**_

**Birdie**: Daddy! Oh, answer his question! Answer his question!

**Lovi**: Why did you call him daddy?

**Birdie**: Because I'm Matthew's adopted daughter, duh!

**Lovi**: How does this work?

**Birdie**: He took pity on me because I'm invisible to others like he is to you guys sometimes and since he and Prussia are dating, that makes Prussia my daddy!

**Toni**: Makes sense to me! Anyway, Gilbert! Mi amigo! I would have to say that our favorite position is the Reverse Italian. Its basically the reverse cowgirl, but Lovi's not a cowgirl so we just say Italian.

**Lovi**: CHIGI! Don't tell him that! *smack Antonio*

**Birdie**: I think that they would love to double date with you guys!

**Lovi**: No we wouldn't!

**Toni**: Yes we do!

**Birdie**: Well, its settled! Double date tomorrow! Bye you guys!


	5. Chapter 5

**Birdie**: Well, I think it is safe to update this now…..been a while since we've answered any questions…

**Lovi**: Yea...Peach-Bitch, where have you been?

**Birdie**: Awww! Lovi, where you worried about me!?

**Lovi**: NO! I've just been wondering where the fuck you've been.

**Toni**: I believe that Senorita Birdie has been in University, Lovi!

**Birdie**: Yes…I have been…and it is a BITCH! I HATE IT THERE! I don't like being there! The only good things that have happened would be that I met some amazing people, but THAT'S IT!

**Lovi**: … *whispers to Toni* I've never see her get so worked up…I think I like it…

**Toni**: *eyes widen* Umm….Senorita Birdie, maybe you should calm down a bit, si?

**Birdie**: *huffs* Fine…since you asked so nicely Toni.

**Lovi**: *grumbles* Damn Tomato-Bastard…

**Birdie**: Well, ANYWAY, let's get on to the next round of questions!

**_Dear Romano, _**

**_First off, yes I did call you by your proper name, cause I don't like that nickname "Lovi" it just plain annoying to me (no offence to Spain or Birdie). _**

**_Okay my questions are: _**

**_is it you can deal with people who are so annoying? _**

**_you worked for Spain as a kid did you wear a dress or a pink shirt and blue pants? I was always wondering about that._**

**_From, animegirl1012 or Rose_**

**Lovi**: FINALLY! Someone agrees with me on that stupid name!

**Birdie**: Oh calm down! I personally call you that JUST to piss you off…because I've become a sadist like that in over the past year…

**Toni**: I call you that because you're my little Lovi! *cuddles Lovi*

**Lovi**: Ugh…to answer your questions, I deal with them because deep down…I don't hate them as much as I say I do…I hate them EVEN MORE and I am trying to keep from killing them.

**Birdie**: I think that means "I care about them" in Lovi-Language…

**Toni**: *nods*

**Lovi**: *rolls eyes* And secondly, I did NOT wear a dress when I worked for the Tomato-Bastard! I wore boys clothing! I'M NOT LIKE FELI!

**Toni**: One of the maids did TRY to dress him up once…along with Bella's help (Belgium).

**Birdie**: ….Well….moving ON!

**_Dear Toni,_**

**_do you have a tomato fetish? and if so, have you ever acted on that with a certain tsundere Italian?_**

**_Yours,_**

**_Chocolate_AlbinoCreamPuff_**

**Toni**: Mios Dios no! I do not have any fetishes! Especially not tomato ones!

**Birdie**: Actually, I once read somewhere that you guys used tomatoes as lube once…it wasn't very nice considering that Feli-

**Lovi**: Do NOT continue your statement you Peach-Bitch…although the Tomato-Bastard HAS tried to convince me to roleplay with him about his armada days…

**Birdie**: …..I'm so telling Iggy that…

**Toni**: NO! Senorita Birdie, you can't!

**Birdie**: Alright, fine…I won't tell him…

**Lovi**: Next question dammit!

**_I HAS A QUESTION! Well two... One for each. Spain, where you really a pedo? Or did you wait for Lovi to become an adult before you had hot passionate man sex? Roma, Have you ever had the want to come home to Spain in a Mafia suit and top him? If yes... CAN I WATCH?_**

**Birdie**: That question wasn't in the right format…that irritates me…

**Lovi**: Calm your OCD for just five minutes.

**Toni**: Why does everyone think I touched Lovi when he was smaller!? I would never do that! Of course I waited till he was of age!

**Birdie**: I think that it's because you're a part of the Bad Touch Trio…you guys do have a bad reputation with people. I'm not saying that any of it is true but…people talk…

**Lovi**: Its mostly because of Gilbert trying to steal people's fucking vital regions…

**Toni**: Francis and I have TALKED TO HIM ABOUT THAT!

**Lovi**: Whatever…no…I have NOT thought of that fantasy at all…*shifty eyes*…and even if I did, NO YOU CAN'T FUCKING WATCH!

**Birdie**: Well, that's all the time we have for today folks. Be sure to leave us more questions. We certainly have a few to go through. Also, we are going in the order that we receive questions, so if your question doesn't get answered right away, then it's because it is at the bottom of the list currently and it WILL get answered…eventually.

**Lovi**: This is what you get for fucking procrastinating Peach-Bitch.

**Birdie**: Oh hush!

**Toni**: See you all next time~


End file.
